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  • What to do with 2 cows from arround the world

    Posted by Administrator 2 on 7 September 2003 at 11:57

    TRADITIONAL CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
    You sell them and retire on the income.

    AMERICAN CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the band, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release.
    The public buys your bull.

    AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are
    surprised when the cow drops dead.

    FRENCH CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You go on strike because you want three cows.

    JAPANESE CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and
    produce twenty time the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images
    called Cowikimon and market them worldwide.

    A GERMAN CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk
    themselves.

    AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
    You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are… You break for lunch.

    A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You count them and learn you have five cows.
    You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
    You count them again and learn you have 12 cows.
    You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

    A SWISS CORPORATION
    You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for
    storing them.

    CHINESE CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You have 300 people milking them.
    You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman
    who reported the numbers.

    A BRITISH CORPORATION
    You have two cows… both are mad.

    A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION
    You have two cows… and the one on the left is kinda cute…

    Paul Goodwin replied 22 years, 1 month ago 1 Member · 1 Reply
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